this entry is made of 100% recycled material

Seeing as all I do now is post random shiznat that I've written at some point in my life, here's a free write from English 2231: Short Story and Novel Study with Richard Harrison. The date is October 2nd, 2006. Important names have been removed to protect the innocence of everyone in general. Fill in the blanks with your own name, your pet's name, your dad's name, your estranged uncle's name, or perhaps Alan Rickman - it's your choice.


Let's discuss my plans to seduce ___ _______. Plan 1: whilst channeling 'sexy', or the pelvic region, I approach the unassuming target, ___ _______, whilst he is busy - perhaps eating. Perhaps eating peach pie. Now, as the target is in my clear view, I will approach in a cool, calm, collected manner, and perhaps place my hand on his shoulder, and I will state, "Hey ___. We should date." Then, being taken back by my directness, he will agree to a date and we will become lovers. Plan 2: Since ___ loves to mountain climb, and by that I mean wall climb, I will have my friend Allie teach me to wall climb like a pro. Now, I won't let ___ know that I've been training, and I will ask him to teach me how to wall climb. Then, he will be so impressed by my mad "beginners" skills, we will become mountain lovers. Like mountain lions, but with less mauling and more lovin'.


To those concerned that I will never write anything real or interesting again - never fear! I promise my next entry will be fresh and up-to-date.